Well two days off and they ran by so fast I am confused as to where they went...........
We still have Joshua off of the morning Risperdal, he is doing OK, when he is happy it is great but when one thing happens that he does not like it is a meltdown for a long time yelling, crying, mad, etc he keeps walking around saying the sound "xs" like at the end of the word "ox".........
he is saying it constantly he was reading and did not say the word "walks" the right way in the end so Gary was working with him on pronouncing the end of the words the "ks" part and now he chosen that sound to be his new perseveration.
This morning he did well playing laughing etc, then he went to the park...........ever since the park he has been completely on an emotional roller coaster, we have put him in bed already because it is getting to be much for all of us (well he is supposed to be in bed but I hear Gary down there as I am writing and it sounds like they are wrestling around and stuff) He would not get his pajamas on after the bath so I had to pull out the old "if you do not stop yelling and crying by the count of three you are going in time out" well needless to say he calmed it down but then within a couple minutes he was back on stage whooping it up, he is stuck on "Jacob broke the computer" he thinks for some reason unknown to me, that Jacob broke the computer we keep telling him it is fine but he keeps on saying it and then yells out his mad word "one hundred!" it is kinda funny but not so much when he is yelling and stomping around telling us to "stop it" or "don't do it mommy" or the all time favorite "Jacob is too loud" most of the time when this happens Jacob is humming a song, or making a noise with paper or some object, or just sitting quietly my poor Jacob..............but Jacob has learned to stand up for himself so if Joshua says "Jacob be quite" Jacob says "no" or "be happy Josh" when he does talk back to Joshua ..... oh look out someone must have cancelled the Disney Channel because then Joshua starts really shouting and says "Jacob told me no! Put him in time out" He blames at least 3/4 of anything on Jacob.
Thankfully my Jacob is a happy boy, he is behind in his speech but not too bad the doctors say it is because of being around Joshua, but anyway.... he is such a happy boy he sings and hums, he talks to himself when playing with toys, and he always wants to be right by you or on your lap. I feel bad for him sometimes being brought into this but I believe he has such a great personality that he will be fine. He smiles more then anyone I know and that in itself is a huge blessing.
I will be working the next 2 days and then I am off again for 2, then my long stretch starts all over again ......... My throat is sore I believe it is because I am exhausted, even though I am off I slept horrible last night so I feel worse then 2 days ago. I did however get to watch a movie on my computer late last night so that was a nice treat. I do not get to do that often so it was great to me.
Gary is back from Joshua's room and it is all quiet now, Gary said Joshua is watching B Movie all snuggled into bed relaxing. That is the best thing for him right now, well for all of us. I have a bad headache from all the shouting and crying and this is not like tear crying this is the sound of crying loudly but no tears so it is even worse to me at that point. I am sure it is due to the decrease in the Risperdal too, but then again maybe not, it is so hard with Autism as you know, you try to pinpoint the behaviors trigger.......what did he eat? Has he had his daily supplements? How did he sleep? Does he not feel well? Is it because of the medication? Sometimes you just can not pin point the cause it just is............ it just is Autism. But now it is starting to wind down a bit and I am hopping my throat and headache will be getting better by tomorrow morning, I do not like feeling like this when I work (well no one does right?) If I had any sick time I might just call off to work but I do not and I can not afford to lose a days pay right now, so if I am sick I go anyway.
I am very tired right now and hope to get to bed soon!!!! Just a little blog this evening telling of Joshua's behaviors he will be back at school tomorrow so we will see if he has good days this week I pray he does and we can continue with the medication taper that would be so amazing!!
I told everyone when we went to get the Stem Cell Treatment that if he could end up at least getting off the medication I would be beyond thrilled and I will be still, if he can get down to half I will still be happy...............time will tell. I am just here to do Gods work in raising Joshua the best that I can no matter what that is my real job, my real meaning.
Goodnight all ~~~ Hope your weekend was extra special~~~Lori
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